With 9-hole handicaps of 19 (The Snowman), 10 (Mr. Fifteen), 9 (the Commish), and 7 (Mr. FourSkin) who could have guessed that this motley crew of April Fools could produce real drama in a tightly contested round of golf? Well, because of the games that we play, every stroke can become important, even if sometimes you need 70 of them to complete 9 holes.
And today was just such a round. In the Team competition, Commish (hereafter referred to as RS) and The Snowman (BL) were teamed against the Misters Fifteen (CS) and FourSkin (BC) in a 9-hole match play game with the losers buying a beer for each of the winners. Simultaneously there is a full handicap stroke play game going on in which the player with the highest “net” score buys a beer for the player with the lowest net. If there is a tie then multiple beers can become involved, and this match had all of the ingredients of such an event.
After 6 holes, Team BL/RS was 2 down to BC/CS with just 3 to play. As for the individual “beer event,” those standings would not be known until the tee box for the 8th hole when all -players had to announce their current score.
The 7th hole is a dogleg right with lots of trouble on the right. Anything that starts to fade is liable to end up in the ravine. Four decent (read that as “findable”) drives placed everyone still in play but only the Commish was on the green in regulation, giving Team BC/RS a chance to get one hole back. Alas, his recalcitrant putter three-whacked from 25 feet. On Team BC/CS, Mr. FourSkin was over the back of the green with his 2nd and hit a delicate downhill chip that peeked at the hole and then slowly dribble some 8 feet further downhill. CS was in for a 6 and out of the hole but BC 2-putted to seemingly push the and all but insure the victory for Team BC/CS. But wait, The Snowman was on the green in 3 and he got a stroke from everyone and, with a quiet 2-putt his bogey along with one of his 19 handicap strokes was a winner. Team BL/RS had life, one down with 2 to go.
Announcing score on the 8th tee, the b’hoys stood at 47, net 28 for The Snowman (BL), 39 net 30 for Commish (RS), 39 net 29 for Mr. Fifteen (CS), and 38 net 31 for Mr. FourSkin (BC); it was still anyone’s beer to win…or lose.
A pair of bogeys by CS and RS produced no blood, but then BC 2-putted for a par and seemingly winning the team match for BC/CS. But wait, The Snowman was on in 3 and he got a stroke. One putt would take the win from Team BC/CS and tie the match going to the final hole…the #1 rated, or most difficult hole on the course. While BL missed the first putt, his second putt along with another handicap stroke gave him a net par and that hole was pushed. Net scores going to the last hole stood at BL 33, CS 34, RS 35, and BC 35.
The tough par 4 uphill 9th put three balls in the fairway with the 4th just off in the right rough, everyone between 275 and 215 yards out. No one made it on in 2, but, after the third shots RS was on the green about 15 feet away; BC was over the green; CS and BL were each just a few yards short of the green and with the scores so tight anyone could win the beer. In fact it was so close that it was possible for someone to either win 3 beers or even to lose as many as three beers.
Mr. Fifteen chipped and 2-putted for a 6, giving him a net 40. Commish 2-putted for a bogey 5 and a net 40. However, Commish gave Mr. Fifteen a stroke on the hole so his double bogey tied Commish and Team BC/CS was still 1-up in the Team Event. Mr. FourSkin needed a good chip and a one-putt to finish with a net 40 and tie for the possible lead or also the possible lose with another net of 40 strokes; but he missed the putt and was in with a double bogey 6 and a net of 41. Now it was up to The Snowman. In the gathering gloom of evening with the sun quickly going down, BL stood over his putt knowing that he was on in 4 and of he could get down in 2 strokes his net 39 would be good enough to win. The other 3 knew that a 2-putt was not guaranteed, especially since on the par 3 6th hole Frosty has 5-putted. No, that is not a typo. BL was on the green in 1 and walked off with a double par 6! Listen, he is not a 19 handicap for nothing, you know.
His first putt was short and he was now about 4 feet away with a net score of 38. Another miss and BC would be buying beer for each of the other 3 players. Nervously standing over the putt, The Snowman sunk the putt and won outright with his net of 39. But wait, that was not all. While RS has the low score ont he hole, he didn’t win because CS got a stroke from him, but while BL tied CS with a 6 he received a stroke from CS and his net 5 on the hole not only won the hole but it halved the team match so that no further blood, or in this case beer, was spilled.
All of that excitement and the final result was that only a single beer was bought by BC for BL, and now, after 2 rounds for the season The Snowman has had free beer at the fabulous Crackpot Seafood Restaurant each week. Imagine, all of this excitement and not a single score above a Hanger (a 7) after The Snowman’s pair of snowmen to start the round