Games We Play

Years ago we used to play Skins for a quarter a hole. To tell the truth, while we all liked to win, it didn’t mean anything. Then for perhaps five or six years we played solely to beat each other. This was relatively satisfying; but, in 2005 we started a truly great season-long game.

The Weekly Beer Contest:

We play a 9-hole twilight round every Wednesday at Mt. Pleasant Golf Course in Baltimore, MD. Each week we play for a single beer, full handicap, every stroke counts, no gimmes. For the season the results are compiled weekly and the season’s champion is the player winning the most beers.

Each week, one beer. Low net score gets a beer from the high net score. If two players tie for worst they each have to buy a beer for the winner but the records would reflect just a loss of one-half beer for each losing player. Every now and then the winner actually will get three free beers even though his record will only show Plus one.

The Coveted Simian Award (formerly known as The Specimen Cup):

In 2007 we added the season-long Race for the Chee’burger, a demonstration of our “evolving skills”. Now in addition to a beer on the line each week, the most-improved player for the season will be treated to a cheeseburger dinner at the fabulous Crackpot Bar and Restaurant where one of the bartenders, Mr. C’Mon Thirteen Levine, may actually serve the victor and award him with “The Simian Award.”

This award is based upon a complex cyphering done by the BGA’s own super computer in the Central Office. It entails analyzing the most improvement over the previous year’s statistics in % of Fairways, % of Greens in Regulation, % of Pars and % of Birdies. In this highly contested competition, the winner is not the one with the highest totals but the player whose totals improved the most over the previous year. True to form for the BGA, in 2008, no one qualified as everyone’s stats took a step backwards. This is akin to getting a yellow ribbon when your entry in the only one in the contest. (This actually happened to me at a 4-H fair for my stringbeans, but that’s a story for another day.)

Each month, a current chart is posted with all of the totals being recalculated after the last round of the month. Weekly updates of each round are posted by an impartial observer in The Scribe’s Report.

The Great Round Contest:

In 2007 the BGA instituted an additional game wherein any player who records a net 31 also wins a cheeseburger dinner from the other players. So far this has happened once or twice a year and it always brings up some “reminders and encouragement” on the eighth and ninth holes. Reminders such as “All you need is an eagle and a birdie,” or “Anywhere but left.” Helpful little reminders. Past winners of the “Quality Chee’burger” round are also posted on the Simian Award chart.